I Want To Be Straight

A boy that likes boys and doesn't like that.

Monitoring you, like machines do

You’ve been walking,
You’ve been hiding,
And you look half dead half the time.
Monitoring you, like machines do,

When i told my mom that i’m gay, i told her that i was monitoring myself in the last year to don’t have nothing with boys.

Yesterday we were talking and she asked me if i was monitoring myself. I said no, what was a lie in parts. I talked a lot with some gay friends yesterday, so i’m not running away from gays to be straight. But i still monitor myself to don’t think in V.

And anyway, she told me to don’t monitor myself and “just let it go”. This takes a weight of my shoulders, but my mom isn’t my only problem.

At first, i know that even if my mom accepts me as gay, she won’t be as happy as she would be if i’m straight.

And i still need to hide my love from some people, work a lot for nothing and gays are more endangered than straights, there are some crazy homophobics serial-killers. Even if everyone can be a victim of some crazy guy, if you are different (in any way), the risks are higher.

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